it is been two weeks since i drafted this, just now am posting it here....
writing something for the sake of writing gives a good feel to me. i don't knwo what for am writing nor about what, still i keep writing with my half-baked grammar. writing in tamizh is even better. feelings can be told without much translations, but computer typing in tamizh becomes pain, am lazy and i am week in that grammar and spellings too. usage of words is very important. using it rightly at the right moment is even more important. knowing what not to tell reduces most of your job while writing/talking. sticking to the precise note and moving your lines towards the feeling that you want to achieve with the readers is an art and it can be learnt only with observation of oneself and things around her/him. i am very bad with observations. that is a mother nature's gift to me. though few times i pass but not all the times, wit is not my forte. pouring down words is mine, instead of using 2 words i end up using 100 words to tell the very same thing. digression, this word i recently learnt, is what i end up doing. i feel like without all that stories those two words dont get the real understanding.
my english and vocabulary is not very strong. it is simple and normal like any other person from my place. for that matter even if i write in tamizh it will not have so many variations of words, it’s been long since i wrote in tamizh. i would like to improve it. i read books for this purpose but while reading my focus goes into the story more than the language and usage of it as a tool to create that impact. this happens even if i read it for the 2nd or 3rd time. like when i watch the movie any number of times, i just can't focus on the technical things like editing, background score, lightening or any other thing.
it is not like a fault of mine to not know it, i know that. but even with my efforts my concentration goes off the mark. for this only i am asked to do vipasanaa by raghu?
thoughts travel very fast. you can't back track them easily. everytime i wander in the fields of my thoughts at a point i try to stop and try tracking back its path. it is fun to do like that. have you ever tried it? it is kind of a game for me. i try vipassana once in a while, these days am not able t sit for more than 10 mins, and the moment i try to concentrate thoughts would start running behind the bullet express.
the word mine that is specified has a lot different meaning than you all know. i always strongly believe every word has a unique meaning depending on its source and situation, such is this word 'mine'. it always makes me feel the breeze.
i don't know if it is a coincidence but it is raining outside after long and am sitting inside the office hearing the noise and once in while feeling the chillness touching me with love. when did i last get in rain? when was that i got drenched last? nepal?
it should be raining in sholayur too!
i started writing this thing nearly 10 days back. kept adding lines to it whenever feeling bored and wanting entertainment. saturday night i had so much urge to talk, to share my feelings with someone who can hear it as in h-e-a-r and not estimate me with that. i had so many people's name running in my brain but one name stood clear but very far that i know i would never able to acknowledge it, it is prohibited. i lost few privileges.
i have gained few to keep my life going. life plays games with you. your brain tries to respond and play similar game. it was long since that my brain has found what would be best for me irrespective of my emotion and would make me do it. at times i feel my emotions never exist, but the truth is my brain knows to prove the reason and accept it so i dont suffer much easily.
with all the mud that forms on the path a single rain washes away it and makes the path clear. water has so much power. the dampness gives the softness. even be it salt water it clears you to create something new. i am waiting for one such now... until then i have this space to talk out my heart like a man shouting from mid of a desert..
writing something for the sake of writing gives a good feel to me. i don't knwo what for am writing nor about what, still i keep writing with my half-baked grammar. writing in tamizh is even better. feelings can be told without much translations, but computer typing in tamizh becomes pain, am lazy and i am week in that grammar and spellings too. usage of words is very important. using it rightly at the right moment is even more important. knowing what not to tell reduces most of your job while writing/talking. sticking to the precise note and moving your lines towards the feeling that you want to achieve with the readers is an art and it can be learnt only with observation of oneself and things around her/him. i am very bad with observations. that is a mother nature's gift to me. though few times i pass but not all the times, wit is not my forte. pouring down words is mine, instead of using 2 words i end up using 100 words to tell the very same thing. digression, this word i recently learnt, is what i end up doing. i feel like without all that stories those two words dont get the real understanding.
my english and vocabulary is not very strong. it is simple and normal like any other person from my place. for that matter even if i write in tamizh it will not have so many variations of words, it’s been long since i wrote in tamizh. i would like to improve it. i read books for this purpose but while reading my focus goes into the story more than the language and usage of it as a tool to create that impact. this happens even if i read it for the 2nd or 3rd time. like when i watch the movie any number of times, i just can't focus on the technical things like editing, background score, lightening or any other thing.
it is not like a fault of mine to not know it, i know that. but even with my efforts my concentration goes off the mark. for this only i am asked to do vipasanaa by raghu?
thoughts travel very fast. you can't back track them easily. everytime i wander in the fields of my thoughts at a point i try to stop and try tracking back its path. it is fun to do like that. have you ever tried it? it is kind of a game for me. i try vipassana once in a while, these days am not able t sit for more than 10 mins, and the moment i try to concentrate thoughts would start running behind the bullet express.
the word mine that is specified has a lot different meaning than you all know. i always strongly believe every word has a unique meaning depending on its source and situation, such is this word 'mine'. it always makes me feel the breeze.
i don't know if it is a coincidence but it is raining outside after long and am sitting inside the office hearing the noise and once in while feeling the chillness touching me with love. when did i last get in rain? when was that i got drenched last? nepal?
it should be raining in sholayur too!
i started writing this thing nearly 10 days back. kept adding lines to it whenever feeling bored and wanting entertainment. saturday night i had so much urge to talk, to share my feelings with someone who can hear it as in h-e-a-r and not estimate me with that. i had so many people's name running in my brain but one name stood clear but very far that i know i would never able to acknowledge it, it is prohibited. i lost few privileges.
i have gained few to keep my life going. life plays games with you. your brain tries to respond and play similar game. it was long since that my brain has found what would be best for me irrespective of my emotion and would make me do it. at times i feel my emotions never exist, but the truth is my brain knows to prove the reason and accept it so i dont suffer much easily.
with all the mud that forms on the path a single rain washes away it and makes the path clear. water has so much power. the dampness gives the softness. even be it salt water it clears you to create something new. i am waiting for one such now... until then i have this space to talk out my heart like a man shouting from mid of a desert..
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